Celebrating Accomplishments
Those of us who live in North America are immersed in a culture that values achievement, often at the expense of relationships. The Bible puts forth an alternate view. Recognition of accomplishments in the story of God are seen through a broader lense. They are placed in the context of community, including not just people but creation. And life is seen is a broad sense, with accomplishments along the way. Living in this perspective is counter-cultural. But it is also important to validate the accomplishments of our children. How can we celebrate accomplishments in a way that is not individualistic, and that keeps accomplishments in the context of relationships with God and others? This month’s text is from Paul’s letter to the church in Philippi. Paul gives thanks for the community and their ongoing faithfulness to God. He expresses confidence that God will continue to work through them, and recognizes that the completion of that work belongs to God. How can we use this as a model for celebrating the accomplishments of children and families?
Read It
Philippians 1:3-6
“3 I thank my God every time I remember you, 4 constantly praying with joy in every one of my prayers for all of you, 5 because of your sharing in the gospel from the first day until now. 6 I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work among you will bring it to completion by the day of Jesus Christ.”
“3 I thank my God every time I remember you, 4 constantly praying with joy in every one of my prayers for all of you, 5 because of your sharing in the gospel from the first day until now. 6 I am confident of this, that the one who began a good work among you will bring it to completion by the day of Jesus Christ.”
Do It
Start trying this out in different ways, with different accomplishments. Each family will have different things that need to be celebrated. For some children, the passing of a test is the result of very hard work, and deserves to be recognized. For others, it’s mastery of a skill, the completion of a school year, learning to walk...It’s also important for children to see their parents’ accomplishments be celebrated in a way that values the journey over the “success” (promotion, winning a game…). Below is an attempt to reframe accomplishments in a way that celebrates the investment of the child and community, rather than celebrating only individual achievement. Try this basic concept, described here with the example of the completion of a year of school, and tweak it according to what works for your family.
Name the Accomplishment
“You are done with preschool!” Set the scene so they know it’s a special time, maybe with a few balloons, or something else that your family sees as an indication of celebration.
Put it in Perspective
“You learned a lot at home/with caregiver for a few years, then you were ready to learn in a new way. So for two years, you went to preschool and learned so many things there. Now, you’re ready to begin grade school.” If you’re ambitious, you might have a picture timeline of this - or have your child make one with you.
Recognize the Work
“You got up three days a week and got ready. You learned how to be in school. You sang and played and learned more about numbers and letters and weather and time. You explored your world. You learned how to get along with other children.” Let the child name other work from the year. Let them name favorite and least favorite parts of it, things that felt really hard, and things they will miss.
Recognize God at Work
“God’s Spirit has given you curiosity and readiness to learn. God put so many wonderful teachers and friends in your life during preschool. You and your teachers and friends showed each other Jesus’ love.” Let the child name the ways God showed up.
Bless the Child
“Thank you, God, for the many gifts you have given to _______.” As she continues to grow in you, give her curiosity, perseverance, patience, and compassion. Everywhere she goes, may her love shine through you.” Consider having the whole family gather closely around the child for the blessing.
Celebrate
“This is one big accomplishment! When God created you, God began some good work, and God will continue to do good work in you. Let’s celebrate!” Eat a treat, go do something your child loves to do, or do a special project together.
We often are tempted to only celebrate recognizable success, like winning a game. As parents and caregivers, check your perspective. What, in your child’s lifelong journey, do you care most about? Let that guide what you choose to celebrate. For example, we value living in community., so we are more likely to value our child learning to be part of a team in soccer than we are to value his team winning the tournament.
Name the Accomplishment
“You are done with preschool!” Set the scene so they know it’s a special time, maybe with a few balloons, or something else that your family sees as an indication of celebration.
Put it in Perspective
“You learned a lot at home/with caregiver for a few years, then you were ready to learn in a new way. So for two years, you went to preschool and learned so many things there. Now, you’re ready to begin grade school.” If you’re ambitious, you might have a picture timeline of this - or have your child make one with you.
Recognize the Work
“You got up three days a week and got ready. You learned how to be in school. You sang and played and learned more about numbers and letters and weather and time. You explored your world. You learned how to get along with other children.” Let the child name other work from the year. Let them name favorite and least favorite parts of it, things that felt really hard, and things they will miss.
Recognize God at Work
“God’s Spirit has given you curiosity and readiness to learn. God put so many wonderful teachers and friends in your life during preschool. You and your teachers and friends showed each other Jesus’ love.” Let the child name the ways God showed up.
Bless the Child
“Thank you, God, for the many gifts you have given to _______.” As she continues to grow in you, give her curiosity, perseverance, patience, and compassion. Everywhere she goes, may her love shine through you.” Consider having the whole family gather closely around the child for the blessing.
Celebrate
“This is one big accomplishment! When God created you, God began some good work, and God will continue to do good work in you. Let’s celebrate!” Eat a treat, go do something your child loves to do, or do a special project together.
We often are tempted to only celebrate recognizable success, like winning a game. As parents and caregivers, check your perspective. What, in your child’s lifelong journey, do you care most about? Let that guide what you choose to celebrate. For example, we value living in community., so we are more likely to value our child learning to be part of a team in soccer than we are to value his team winning the tournament.
Pray It
God, we are confident of the good work you have begun in our family, and we trust you to bring it to completion. Thank you for showing up!
Explore It
Gardening is a great way to learn to celebrate accomplishments as a family. Here’s a post from Community Playthings about the benefits of gardening together and some tips for how to do it.
Resiliency has been talked about a lot lately as something today’s children are lacking. How we deal with accomplishments is part of developing resiliency. Check out this article to dig deeper into this, along with some practical advice.
Faithful Families, a book by Traci Smith, would be a great addition for your collection if you want a go-to hard copy of ways to celebrate accomplishments, and in general, to remember God in the everyday moments of life.
Resiliency has been talked about a lot lately as something today’s children are lacking. How we deal with accomplishments is part of developing resiliency. Check out this article to dig deeper into this, along with some practical advice.
Faithful Families, a book by Traci Smith, would be a great addition for your collection if you want a go-to hard copy of ways to celebrate accomplishments, and in general, to remember God in the everyday moments of life.
