SEPTEMBER: ATTENDING CHURCH
"Jesus is the center of our faith,
Christ-centered community is the center of our life,
and reconciliation is the center of our work."
Palmer Becker, August 5, 2005
Christ-centered community is the center of our life,
and reconciliation is the center of our work."
Palmer Becker, August 5, 2005
Concept:
“Christ-centered community is the center of our life.” Being part of a family of God is what makes it possible for us to follow Jesus and work for reconciliation. It is SO important. But let’s be honest. Going to church regularly and really being part of a faith community is harder than it seems like it should be. This month we give a few tips for going to church together and helping it to be as worshipful an experience as possible for the whole family. These tips won’t make everything joyfully easy all the time! But they hopefully can help a little.
On a personal note: Our younger son turned two during our pastoral sabbatical. That means he didn’t go to our church from the ages of 23 months to 27 months. He easily found his way at all the other churches we visited during our travels in those months. But then came the Sunday that we returned from our sabbatical. We pulled into our church parking lot, and heard a deep breath come from the backseat. Then: he said, “Home. I am…home.” Was church always entertaining and exciting for him? No! But it was a place of love, comfort, and predictability. It was home.
(Photo by Jason Sung on Unsplash)
“Christ-centered community is the center of our life.” Being part of a family of God is what makes it possible for us to follow Jesus and work for reconciliation. It is SO important. But let’s be honest. Going to church regularly and really being part of a faith community is harder than it seems like it should be. This month we give a few tips for going to church together and helping it to be as worshipful an experience as possible for the whole family. These tips won’t make everything joyfully easy all the time! But they hopefully can help a little.
On a personal note: Our younger son turned two during our pastoral sabbatical. That means he didn’t go to our church from the ages of 23 months to 27 months. He easily found his way at all the other churches we visited during our travels in those months. But then came the Sunday that we returned from our sabbatical. We pulled into our church parking lot, and heard a deep breath come from the backseat. Then: he said, “Home. I am…home.” Was church always entertaining and exciting for him? No! But it was a place of love, comfort, and predictability. It was home.
(Photo by Jason Sung on Unsplash)
Read It: Hebrews 10:24-25
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.
Pray It: God, you call us into a community that is centered in Jesus. Help us encourage each other, and keep us from neglecting to meet together. In Jesus’s name, Amen.
Do It:
- Make it a habit. It is so much easier to go to church when it’s not a decision you’re making every week; it’s just something you do. Truly going every week will help you establish routines that make it all easier. And children really do love repetition. The simple practice of “We go to church on Sundays” is deeply formative.
- Begin the habit Saturday night. Prep what you need - church bag (see below), clothes, even breakfast - the night before. Get everyone (including grownups!) to bed at a decent time. Get up with plenty of time to get ready so you don’t feel like you’re yelling and prodding your way out the door.
- Have a church bag. Set aside one bag that will be used every Sunday for church. Fill it with the tools you and your child(ren) need to help the morning go well (see the list of ideas below). These things can be unique and special for church. Keep some shelf-stable snacks stocked in it as well. If you eat the last snack or use the last diaper on a church day, restock as soon as you get home so you don’t have to think about it in the rush out the door!
- Be thoughtful about what goes in the church bag. While sometimes we’re just trying to keep our children from being loud in church, the actual goal is that, as they gain more language and social skills, they engage more and more in worship. So what we pack in bags is less to distract, more to enable that engagement. Here are some ideas:
- Manipulatives. Some of us listen better when our hands are active. Pack fidget toys and soft blocks.
- Creative supplies. As language develops, it’s fun to see what children will create as they listen and participate. Pack pipe cleaners, playdough or silly putty (with a mat so it doesn’t stick to seats or floors), crayons and paper. Ask your children to show you what they created after worship. Sometimes it will have no clear connection to the service, but sometimes they will surprise you with what they picked up on!
- Bible Story Books. One rule we have never regretted is this: The only books we bring to church are Bibles and Bible story books. For one thing, it keeps our children rooted in the biblical story during communal worship. In addition, as they get older they will automatically start finding the morning’s story in their books and making connections.
- Attachment items. Having a stuffed animal, a particular blanket, or another attachment item that is special for Sundays can help children connect church as a place of comfort.
- By the way, this church bag is for the whole family! You might find that you engage the worship better when you flip a fidget toy, manipulate pipe cleaners, or draw as you listen.
- Participate fully. Even the littlest children are watching you! Model the ways you hope they will engage in their worshiping community. Sing along with songs, pray, listen with your whole self, and talk about it together later.
- Let your community walk with you. People are glad you and your little ones are at church. The vast majority of the people in your church family don’t mind when your children are seen and heard - in fact, most people welcome it. When they offer to help, let them! As long as you feel comfortable with them, allow them to hold your baby, to take a crying little one to the hallway so you can continue to be in the worship service, to carry your bag to the car, to simply be in relationship with you. And when it’s been a day, week, or life, it’s okay to say so!
- Keep Sunday lunch simple. I grew up with big meals for Sunday noon, and it took awhile to let go of that expectation for myself! But it is really okay to keep it simple and predictable. Choose an easy meal you all like and have it every week so you don’t have to think about it. Our family has had several different regular meals over the years: frozen pizza, pasta, sandwiches, Subway, and pancakes. We also know a family who has popcorn, cheese and apples for Sunday lunch every week. Do what works for you!
Explore It:
(From Tami) A few thoughts from my own experiences:
As a pastor’s wife I sometimes felt pressure to have perfect kids in church. But, they weren’t perfect! Remember: In general others would rather have a few disruptions from children in the service than to not have children attend. I was tempted to sit towards the back (since they were not always so perfect!), but found that sitting toward the front decreased distractions for them and helped them focus and feel a part of the congregation. I also took a few adults up on their offer to have a child sit with them and those relationships became important to my children.
Simple Sunday dinners are great. If one wants a more prepared meal, crockpot or frozen meals work well. A resource that has helped me to have meals on the table without much work on the day it is served, whether that is on a Sunday or any other busy day, is The Family Freezer.
Here are a few articles you might find helpful.
(Photo by Rajesh Rajputon Unsplash)
(From Tami) A few thoughts from my own experiences:
As a pastor’s wife I sometimes felt pressure to have perfect kids in church. But, they weren’t perfect! Remember: In general others would rather have a few disruptions from children in the service than to not have children attend. I was tempted to sit towards the back (since they were not always so perfect!), but found that sitting toward the front decreased distractions for them and helped them focus and feel a part of the congregation. I also took a few adults up on their offer to have a child sit with them and those relationships became important to my children.
Simple Sunday dinners are great. If one wants a more prepared meal, crockpot or frozen meals work well. A resource that has helped me to have meals on the table without much work on the day it is served, whether that is on a Sunday or any other busy day, is The Family Freezer.
Here are a few articles you might find helpful.
- 8 Reasons to Bring Your Children to Church
- Engaging Young Children in Church
- Parents, Bring Your Children to Worship
(Photo by Rajesh Rajputon Unsplash)
